While she was "flying" down the road yesterday (10 miles over the
limit), a woman passed over a bridge only to find a cop with a radar gun on the other side lying in wait. The cop pulled her over, walked up to the
car, and with that classic patronizing smirk we all know and love, asked,
"What's your hurry?" To which she replied, "I'm late for work." "Oh
yeah," said the cop, "what do you do?" "I'm a rectum stretcher," she
responded.
The cop stammered, "A what? A rectum stretcher? And just what does a
rectum stretcher do?" "Well," she said, "I start by inserting one finger,
then I work my way up to two fingers, then three, then four, then with
my whole hand in. I work from side to side until I can get both hands
in, and then I slowly but surely stretch, until it's about 6 feet wide."
"And just what the hell do you do with a 6 foot ass hole?" he asked.
She replied, "You give him a radar gun and park him behind a bridge..."
Traffic Ticket $95.00
Court Costs. $45.00
The Look on Cop's Face. PRICELESS